Facta, Non Verba
by XX00Meg00XX
Summary: "He stalks towards the elevator knowing that she'll follow him. He doesn't want to draw any more attention to their conversation, at least if he says goodbye at the elevator he can step inside and let the doors close on this chapter of his life." A what-if alternate ending for 4x22.


_For Lou, who prompted me on twitter. I hope this is remotely close to what you wanted. The angst bug grabbed hold of me, but I managed to throw some fluff in! :)_

**_Disclaimer: I claim no ownership over Castle nor the line borrowed from the dialogue of 4x22. _**

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><p><strong><em>Prompt will be listed at the bottom.<em>**

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><p><span><strong>Facta Non Verba<strong>

_Facta, non verba:__ (L) deeds, not words_

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><p>"<em>And um, that wall that I was telling you about. I think it's coming down."<em>

His breath catches on the next inhale, stuck there in his throat, refusing to be let out. Kate just told him about her wall, the wall he's been trying to breach for the past four years. He's been prepared to talk to her all day, prepared to walk away from her for good because he just can't stand to wait anymore—not after knowing that she's been lying to him.

He wants to be there when that wall comes down, he does, but will that really change anything for them? Hasn't he waited long enough? He's already made his decision; her actions this year helped him with that. Her words won't change anything for him now. It's too late.

"Well, I'd like to be there when it does…" he pauses because it's the truth and at least one of them has the ability to speak the truth right now. He sees the hope flare in her eyes, but he can't—won't let that change what he's about to say. "But, I think it's best if I'm not," he finishes and just as quickly her expression changes, clouds over with despair.

She knows what he's saying, but it won't stop her from asking. "What—what are you saying, Castle?"

He glances passed her, flicks his eyes around the precinct as if looking at it for the last time and perhaps he is.

"I'm grateful for everything that you've done for me, Kate. These past four years—letting me follow you around, it's more than I ever hoped for."

"You sound like you're telling me goodbye," she shakes her head unbelievingly.

"I think there's a time when you have to realize that it's time to move on. I um…" Damn this is harder than he thought it would be.

"Castle, what are you saying?" she questions again.

"This is it for me, Beckett. This was my last case."

She shakes her head again, taking a step back from in as if he's just lashed out at her.

"Why? Why are you doing this?" She blinks through the emotion, fighting the tears that are threatening to spill down her cheeks.

"Because I need to distance myself from this, from…" He cuts himself off before he can say the word 'us' and then he tries again. "I've let this become my life and now I need to move on."

"I don't understand. We were getting closer, things were going well. What changed?"

He shakes his head, anger flaring at her obvious denial to what she's done.

"Everything's changed, Beckett. Actions speak louder than words; you of all people should know that. I can't do this anymore. I'm done."

He walks away from her then, picking up his coat and preparing to say his final goodbye. He stalks towards the elevator knowing that she'll follow him. He doesn't want to draw any more attention to their conversation, at least if he says goodbye at the elevator he can step inside and let the doors close on this chapter of his life.

She does follow him, but she doesn't say anything else, just watches in silence as he presses the down arrow and turns to face her. "I meant it when I said I was grateful. I hope you find happiness one day, Kate. Goodbye."

He steps into the elevator just as the doors open and with one final glance at the place that's been his home for the past four years, he makes his peace with his decision and the doors slide closed.

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><p>He tries to clear the look on her face from his head as he descends to the lobby, he won't feel remorse for his decision when she was the one who forced him to make it. He gave her plenty of chances to tell him the truth, she chose not to.<p>

He's just stepped out onto the street and began his trek home when he hears his name being called and he stops walking, squeezes his eyes shut because he'd know that voice anywhere. Kate.

"Castle!" she calls again and he waits for her to reach him, but he doesn't turn around. She sidesteps him and then turns so that they come face to face.

He's about to ask her what the hell she wants when she answers that question for him, only this time it's not with her words, it's with her mouth. She grabs the lapels of his jacket and spins him around and the next thing he knows his back his shoved against the brick wall of the building behind them and her lips are on his.

Her kiss is bruising, packing all the force of a hurricane as she devours his mouth. Her lips force his open hot, pink tongue plunging inside and she leaves no part of his mouth untouched. And just as the onslaught of her kiss steals the last bit of oxygen he has left she's gone.

He blinks his eyes trying to wrap his mind around what just happened, but she's already stalking away from him and he only catches the flip of her hair before she disappears through the lobby door of the Twelfth Precinct.

He could storm after her, demand an explanation for what she just did, but it would only complicate things more. He'll let that be her goodbye to him. And with that last thought, he continues his walk home.

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><p>It's close to three hours later and he's still sitting in the same spot on the couch that he plopped onto when he walked in the door of his loft. When he'd left the precinct he'd been determined that he was making the right choice, but after that kiss on the sidewalk he's starting to second guess himself. Why would she kiss him if she didn't have feelings for him? What the hell did that kiss mean? Should he have gone after her?<p>

He's tired of the questions. This decision was supposed to take care of that. He was supposed to be able to walk away from her and be done and yet all he's done for the last three hours is think about that damn kiss.

He's off the couch and out the door before he can change his mind and after shouting her address into the taxi he'd slid into he finds himself standing outside her door with no idea what's going to happen.

He knocks a bit harder than necessary, but he needs some damn answers from this maddening, challenging, frustrating woman.

She swings the door open with an annoyed expression and crosses her arms. "Castle, what are you doing here?"

He barges passed her into the apartment and she rolls her eyes and she shuts the door. "What the hell was that kiss, Kate? How did you expect me to walk away from you after that?"

"You weren't…" she whispers and Castle has to strain to hear her.

"What?" he questions as he takes a step closer to her.

"You weren't supposed to walk away. You told me that actions speak louder than words and it hit me that I was losing my last chance to kiss you so I thought 'what the hell' and chased you down."

He buries his face in his hands and tries to process the words that just came out of her mouth. She's driving him crazy.

"What do you want, Kate? I need you to be honest because I'm tired of trying to guess."

"You. I want you. I thought you knew that?"

And here's the conversation they should have had several days ago. It's time to stop dancing around things. "I thought I knew that too, but then I heard you tell a suspect that you remembered everything about your shooting and correct me if I'm wrong here, but shouldn't you have told me those words before you told them to a suspect?"

"I…shit, Castle. That's not how you were supposed to find out," she chokes out as the realization hits her. She's the reason that he started pulling away.

"Then why didn't you just talk to me? Why is it so damn hard for us to have an honest conversation about our feelings towards each other?"

She runs a hand through her hair and walks passed him to get a bottle of water out of her fridge. She offers him one but he declines. After taking two long swallows she sets the bottle on the counter and takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I wish that it was easier for me to open up about things. I've been working on that in therapy, but I haven't been fair to you and there's no excuse for that."

"I don't know what you expect me to say to that."

"You don't have to say anything." She walks passed him into her living room and perches on the edge of her couch.

The silence of the room surrounds them as he stands awkwardly in her kitchen. He has no idea how they're going to get passed this, no clue how they're supposed to move forward, but there is one thing that he wants desperately, her lips on his again.

Kissing her won't fix things and it certainly won't fix them, but perhaps it could be a new start for them if she wants the same outcome that he does. He makes his choice.

"I'm sorry, Kate."

She stands and walks towards him, but then they goes to the door as if she's expecting him to leave. When she reaches for the door knob he shakes his head. "No, I'm not leaving. That's not what I want."

"What do you want?" she asks him and they both know it's the same question he asked her only moments ago.

"I want you to kiss me, again," he says as he takes a step towards her, and then another, and another, until he has her backed up against the door.

Before either of them can change their minds or let the doubt of past choices get in the way, she gives him exactly what he wants. And with the press of their mouths they find the promise of a future.

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><p><em>Lou's prompt: Basically at the end of Undead Again, I wanted to know what it would look like if Castle really did stammer through a "this is my last case"speech, and one of them (doesn't matter which) goes with the "What the hell, this is my last chance to kiss the other person" option.<em>

_**Would love to hear your thoughts! xo**_


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